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497354218 How to Win Friends and Influence People PDFDrive

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CONTENTS

Cover About the Author Also by Dale Carnegie Title Page Dedication Preface to revised edition How this book was written – and why Nine suggestions on how to get the most out of this book

PART ONE: FUNDAMENTAL TECHNIQUES IN HANDLING PEOPLE

1 ‘If You Want to Gather Honey, Don’t Kick Over the Beehive’ 2 The Big Secret of Dealing with People 3 ‘He Who Can Do This Has the Whole World with Him. He Who Cannot Walks a Lonely Way’

PART TWO: SIX WAYS TO MAKE PEOPLE LIKE YOU

1 Do This and You’ll Be Welcome Anywhere 2 A Simple Way to Make a Good First Impression 3 If You Don’t Do This, You Are Headed for Trouble 4 An Easy Way to Become a Good Conversationalist 5 How to Interest People 6 How to Make People Like You Instantly

About the Author

Dale Carnegie, known as ‘the arch-priest of the art of making friends’, pioneered the development of personal business skills, self-confidence and motivational techniques. His books – most notably How to Win Friends and Influence People

  • have sold tens of millions worldwide and, even in today’s changing climate, they remain as popular as ever.

By the same author

How to Develop Self-confidence and Influence People by Public Speaking How to Enjoy Your Life and Your Job How to Stop Worrying and Start Living The Quick and Easy Way to Effective Speaking

This book is dedicated to a man who doesn’t need to read it: my cherished friend Homer Croy

EIGHT THINGS THIS BOOK WILL HELP YOU ACHIEVE

Get out of a mental rut, think new thoughts, acquire new visions, discover new ambitions.

Make friends quickly and easily.

Increase your popularity.

Win people to your way of thinking.

Increase your influence, your prestige, your ability to get things done.

Handle complaints, avoid arguments, keep your human contacts smooth and pleasant.

Become a better speaker, a more entertaining conversationalist.

Arouse enthusiasm among your associates.

This book has done all these things for more than ten million readers in thirty-six languages.

weakened to that extent. Our purpose, therefore, in this revision is to clarify and strengthen the book for a modern reader without tampering with the content. We have not ‘changed’ How to Win Friends and Influence People except to make a few excisions and add a few more contemporary examples. The brash, breezy Carnegie style is intact – even the thirties slang is still there. Dale Carnegie wrote as he spoke, in an intensively exuberant, colloquial, conversational manner. So his voice still speaks as forcefully as ever, in the book and in his work. Thousands of people all over the world are being trained in Carnegie courses in increasing numbers each year. And other thousands are reading and studying How to Win Friends and Influence People and being inspired to use its principles to better their lives. To all of them, we offer this revision in the spirit of the honing and polishing of a finely made tool.

Dorothy Carnegie (Mrs. Dale Carnegie)

Philadelphia, and also courses for the New York Chapter of the American Institute of Electrical Engineers. A total of probably more than fifteen hundred engineers have passed through my classes. They came to me because they had finally realised, after years of observation and experience, that the highest-paid personnel in engineering are frequently not those who know the most about engineering. One can, for example, hire mere technical ability in engineering, accountancy, architecture or any other profession at nominal salaries. But the person who has technical knowledge plus the ability to express ideas, to assume leadership, and to arouse enthusiasm among people – that person is headed for higher earning power. In the heyday of his activity, John D. Rockefeller said that ‘the ability to deal with people is as purchasable a commodity as sugar or coffee.’ ‘And I will pay more for that ability,’ said John D., ‘than for any other under the sun.’ Wouldn’t you suppose that every college in the land would conduct courses to develop the highest-priced ability under the sun? But if there is just one practical, common-sense course of that kind given for adults in even one college in the land, it has escaped my attention up to the present writing. The University of Chicago and the United Y.M.C. Schools conducted a survey to determine what adults want to study. That survey cost $25,000 and took two years. The last part of the survey was made in Meriden, Connecticut. It had been chosen as a typical American town. Every adult in Meriden was interviewed and requested to answer 156 questions – questions such as ‘What is your business or profession? Your education? How do you spend your spare time? What is your income? Your hobbies? Your ambitions? Your problems? What subjects are you most interested in studying?’ And so on. That survey revealed that health is the prime interest of adults – and that their second interest is people; how to understand and get along with people; how to make people like you; and how to win others to your way of thinking. So the committee conducting this survey resolved to conduct such a course for adults in Meriden. They searched diligently for a practical textbook on the subject and found – not one. Finally they approached one of the world’s outstanding authorities on adult education and asked him if he knew of any book that met the needs of this group. ‘No,’ he replied, ‘I know what those adults want. But the book they need has never been written.’ I knew from experience that this statement was true, for I myself had been searching for years to discover a practical, working handbook on human relations. Since no such book existed, I have tried to write one for use in my own

courses. And here it is. I hope you like it. In preparation for this book, I read everything that I could find on the subject – everything from newspaper columns, magazine articles, records of the family courts, the writings of the old philosophers and the new psychologists. In addition, I hired a trained researcher to spend one and a half years in various libraries reading everything I had missed, ploughing through erudite tomes on psychology, poring over hundreds of magazine articles, searching through countless biographies, trying to ascertain how the great leaders of all ages had dealt with people. We read their biographies. We read the life stories of all great leaders from Julius Caesar to Thomas Edison. I recall that we read over one hundred biographies of Theodore Roosevelt alone. We were determined to spare no time, no expense, to discover every practical idea that anyone had ever used throughout the ages for winning friends and influencing people. I personally interviewed scores of successful people, some of them world- famous – inventors like Marconi and Edison; political leaders like Franklin D. Roosevelt and James Farley; business leaders like Owen D. Young; movie stars like Clark Gable and Mary Pickford; and explorers like Martin Johnson – and tried to discover the techniques they used in human relations. From all this material, I prepared a short talk. I called it ‘How to Win Friends and Influence People.’ I say ‘short.’ It was short in the beginning, but it soon expanded to a lecture that consumed one hour and thirty minutes. For years, I gave this talk each season to the adults in the Carnegie Institute courses in New York. I gave the talk and urged the listeners to go out and test it in their business and social contacts, and then come back to class and speak about their experiences and the results they had achieved. What an interesting assignment! These men and women, hungry for self-improvement, were fascinated by the idea of working in a new kind of laboratory – the first and only laboratory of human relationships for adults that had ever existed. This book wasn’t written in the usual sense of the word. It grew as a child grows. It grew and developed out of that laboratory, out of the experiences of thousands of adults. Years ago, we started with a set of rules printed on a card no larger than a postcard. The next season we printed a larger card, then a leaflet, then a series of booklets, each one expanding in size and scope. After fifteen years of experiment and research came this book. The rules we have set down here are not mere theories or guesswork. They work like magic. Incredible as it sounds, I have seen the application of these principles literally revolutionise the lives of many people.

While writing this chapter, I received a letter from a German of the old school, an aristocrat whose forebears had served for generations as professional army officers under the Hohenzollerns. His letter, written from a transatlantic steamer, telling about the application of these principles, rose almost to a religious fervor. Another man, an old New Yorker, a Harvard graduate, a wealthy man, the owner of a large carpet factory, declared he had learned more in fourteen weeks through this system of training about the fine art of influencing people than he had learned about the same subject during his four years in college. Absurd? Laughable? Fantastic? Of course, you are privileged to dismiss this statement with whatever adjective you wish. I am merely reporting, without comment, a declaration made by a conservative and eminently successful Harvard graduate in a public address to approximately six hundred people at the Yale Club in New York on the evening of Thursday, February 23, 1933. ‘Compared to what we ought to be,’ said the famous Professor William James of Harvard, ‘compared to what we ought to be, we are only half awake. We are making use of only a small part of our physical and mental resources. Stating the thing broadly, the human individual thus lives far within his limits. He possesses powers of various sorts which he habitually fails to use.’ Those powers which you ‘habitually fail to use’! The sole purpose of this book is to help you discover, develop and profit by those dormant and unused assets. ‘Education,’ said Dr. John G. Hibben, former president of Princeton University, ‘is the ability to meet life’s situations.’ If by the time you have finished reading the first three chapters of this book

  • if you aren’t then a little better equipped to meet life’s situations, then I shall consider this book to be a total failure so far as you are concerned. For ‘the great aim of education,’ said Herbert Spencer, ‘is not knowledge but action.’ And this is an action book. Dale Carnegie 1936

NINE SUGGESTIONS ON HOW TO GET THE MOST OUT OF THIS

BOOK

  1. If you wish to get the most out of this book, there is one indispensable requirement, one essential infinitely more important than any rule or technique. Unless you have this one fundamental requisite, a thousand rules on how to study will avail little. And if you do have this cardinal endowment, then you can achieve wonders without reading any suggestions for getting the most out of a book. What is this magic requirement? Just this: a deep, driving desire to learn, a vigorous determination to increase your ability to deal with people. How can you develop such an urge? By constantly reminding yourself how important these principles are to you. Picture to yourself how their mastery will aid you in leading a richer, fuller, happier and more fulfilling life. Say to yourself over and over: ‘My popularity, my happiness and sense of worth depend to no small extent upon my skill in dealing with people.’

  2. Read each chapter rapidly at first to get a bird’s-eye view of it. You will probably be tempted then to rush on to the next one. But don’t – unless you are reading merely for entertainment. But if you are reading because you want to increase your skill in human relations, then go back and reread each chapter thoroughly. In the long run, this will mean saving time and getting results.

  3. Stop frequently in your reading to think over what you are reading. Ask yourself just how and when you can apply each suggestion.

  4. Read with a crayon, pencil, pen, magic marker or highlighter in your hand. When you come across a suggestion that you feel you can use, draw a line beside it. If it is a four-star suggestion, then underscore every sentence or highlight it, or mark it with ‘****.’ Marking and underscoring a book makes it more interesting, and far easier to review rapidly.

  5. I knew a woman who had been office manager for a large insurance concern for fifteen years. Every month, she read all the insurance contracts her company had issued that month. Yes, she read many of the same contracts over month after month, year after year. Why? Because

  6. Offer your spouse, your child or some business associate a dime or a dollar every time he or she catches you violating a certain principle. Make a lively game out of mastering these rules.

  7. The president of an important Wall Street bank once described, in a talk before one of my classes, a highly efficient system he used for self- improvement. This man had little formal schooling; yet he had become one of the most important financiers in America, and he confessed that he owed most of his success to the constant application of his homemade system. This is what he does. I’ll put it in his own words as accurately as I can remember. ‘For years I have kept an engagement book showing all the appointments I had during the day. My family never made any plans for me on Saturday night, for the family knew that I devoted a part of each Saturday evening to the illuminating process of self-examination and review and appraisal. After dinner I went off by myself, opened my engagement book, and thought over all the interviews, discussions and meetings that had taken place during the week. I asked myself: ‘“What mistakes did I make that time?” ‘“What did I do that was right – and in what way could I have improved my performance?” ‘“What lessons can I learn from that experience?” ‘I often found that this weekly review made me very unhappy. I was frequently astonished at my own blunders. Of course, as the years passed, these blunders became less frequent. Sometimes I was inclined to pat myself on the back a little after one of these sessions. This system of self- analysis, self-education, continued year after year, did more for me than any other one thing I have ever attempted. ‘It helped me improve my ability to make decisions – and it aided me enormously in all my contacts with people. I cannot recommend it too highly.’ Why not use a similar system to check up on your application of the principles discussed in this book? If you do, two things will result. First, you will find yourself engaged in an educational process that is both intriguing and priceless. Second, you will find that your ability to meet and deal with people will grow enormously.

  8. You will find at the end of this book several blank pages on which you

should record your triumphs in the application of these principles. Be specific. Give names, dates, results. Keeping such a record will inspire you to greater efforts; and how fascinating these entries will be when you chance upon them some evening years from now! In order to get the most out of this book: a. Develop a deep, driving desire to master the principles of human relations. b. Read each chapter twice before going on to the next one. c. As you read, stop frequently to ask yourself how you can apply each suggestion. d. Underscore each important idea. e. Review this book each month. f. Apply these principles at every opportunity. Use this volume as a working handbook to help you solve your daily problems. g. Make a lively game out of your learning by offering some friend a dime or a dollar every time he or she catches you violating one of these principles. h. Check up each week on the progress you are making. Ask yourself what mistakes you have made, what improvement, what lessons you have learned for the future. i. Keep notes in the back of this book showing how and when you have applied these principles.

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497354218 How to Win Friends and Influence People PDFDrive

Course: Bachelor of Secondary Education major in English (BSED)

999+ Documents
Students shared 2041 documents in this course

University: Bicol University

Was this document helpful?